A few records to be set straight I think!

Wow, you go to Manchester for a day and don't check your blog and then the next you've got like 10+ comments to approve! Mind blowing really, as I wasn't expecting such a quick rise in interest.

Despite the very sound advice of fellow feminists out there, I have allowed all the comments for now because I feel I need to illustrate the very pressures and opinions that I am opposed to you. And also I feel that I have mis-represented myself to people who have just come to my blog having not seen me commenting on others for the last few months.

I do not hate men. I was angry when I wrote the 'grace getting angry...' post, hence the title. Everyone gets angry, and most bloggers, when angry, blog about it.

I have a boyfriend, and I love him, and I don't believe that he is some exception to the rule, I know lots of men who aren't misogynists and I have lots of male friends, always have done - i've always got on really well with men, usually better than women - I hate misogyny, and I hate misogynists.

I have basically been accused of being a racist which annoys me because I hate racism, and I hate discrimination. And I know a bunch of 'johns' will come back and say that i'm discriminating against them because their personality is one which loves to look at pornography etc., but that's like saying if I don't like a genre of music i'm discriminating against the musicians of that genre!

Anonymous said...

"Don't you think it's a bit sad that a man of your age is perusing the internet for pictures of women's genitalia" .. that is the nature of male sexuality, like dark skin is the nature of an Africans complexion.

Try "Don't you think it is a bit sad a man of your complexion ......" .... looks rather hateful like that, not to mention illegal.

If Britney and the other women agree to put out to a stranger three times every week, then maybe we will discuss removing the lads mags. If we can have what we really want then maybe we will stop merely looking at what we want.

You should consider carefully that you may be peddling hate of a similar nature and intellectual level to the BNP.

Firstly, Anonymous (this one as there were a few!) - looking at britney's crotch is NOT part of male sexuality! It is part of a direction of socialisation that has lead men to believe that to be manly mean to look at pornographic images and wank over them, and that to be feminine is to pose naked and feel empowered when men view them solely on their appearance.

Secondly, not ALL men even consider this to be part of their sexuality so that is completely different from the complexion of an African person. Plus skin colour is not an opinion - but you are likening the two and downplaying the importance of the identity of African people in order to prove your point that i'm discriminating against misogynists. The way you rephrased it WOULD be illegal and I would never say that because I respect the culture and diversity of all people, UNLESS it harms others (i.e. I do not respect acid being thrown in the faces of 'unfaithful' women in some cultures) - that doesn't make me a racist.

"If Britney and the other women agree to put out to strangers..." - I see so men who read lads-mags wish that celebrity women would just come round and have sex with them despite not knowing them? That's a lovely aspect of male sexuality isn't it? Which no doubt all men share (again, NOT my actual opinion, rather a sarcastic retort)

Well thanks for saying that I could incite intellectual hate and everything but that's not my aim, nor that of any other feminist - and thanks for likening us to white supremacists - who is tarring who with what brush now?

John Brissenden said...

Although a bit of gratuitous Google-bait never does one's traffic any harm, I think you might find many of your visitors today are lured by the link to your "Grace getting angry" post from Comment Is Free...

Wow i've been linked by a website! And it wasn't even a outwardly woman hating one either! I'm number 3 in Best of The Web! And nice that Mr John Brissenden just popped in to tell me about it and didn't say anything nasty about my job or non existent racist attitudes. Thanks John.

Anonymous said...

Boy you've a lot of anger Grace. That's very sad, and it seems to manifest itself in an aggressive manner which isn't healthy for you or the people around you...

This was a very long comment which you'll be able to see for the time being - and this is what i was talking about with the whole 'man hating' thing. I realise that the particularly angry post was fueled by personal opinion, but as I said above, most blogs are. I'm not generally an angry person, but when you're a young woman in this world and you look around you and realise that you'd probably be more respected if you said things like "If I had the body for it, i'd be a lap dancer" than "I have an opinion on society" it's frustrating!

"then change your life as there are some wonderful, kind, creative, strong (NB 'strong' is different from 'aggressive') men out there."

This is heartfelt now, not angry, so don't imbue with me with an aggressive tone, i'm speaking clearly with a slight plead in my voice: Again i know this, and I don't believe that aggression and strength are the same thing. I love art and music and poetry and literature and films created by men, I love the sound opinions of men, I love my dad and his love for me. I love men with STRENGTH of character and I know some extremely kind men who I hope I will know for the rest of my life - and when i'm with them I don't assume that they are misogynists. I don't assume that they love pornography and that they want to dominate women, I assume that they are my friends who respect my opinions as I respect theres.

I AM sorry that I came across as a man hater. This is me looking at my blog objectively. This is not an angry blog, you only have to look at my Mommy's Girl post to know that. I'm not pissed off and loving it.

Another Anonymous but who left his name at the end was 'Rory' and I would like to thank him for having a go at Dick Masterson about the way he spoke to me. Although the skeptic in me has a niggling feeling that Rory might have being sarcastic, I really hope that he wasn't. He talks about being a gentleman and I think that's good, I think many man of today forget how to be a gentleman and there's nothing wrong with it. It's just an early (if slightly archaic) version of treating women with respect.

On the 'Grace getting angry...' post:

Anonymous said...

A feminist complaining about lad mags. It's like Scientologists complaining about psychiatry; no-one cares.

Clearly, Anonymous, people do care.

On my first post:

Anonymous said...

Have you heard of this?

Thanks again to another Anonymous, but given that Action Heroes (the link) are a balanced, objective lot who aren't prone to emotional outbursts I guess I don't qualify! i don't know if you posted that to make a point about said outbursts or because you really thought I might fit the bill but thanks anyway.

I wish Anonymous posting didn't exist, as one my lecturers says - 'I don't mind criticism or comments but if you don't put your name with them I won't take notice of them' - basically because hiding behind anonymity is spineless. I do appreciate that if you're not a member of blogger and you're not using beta blogger then there is no option to put in another name, but please leave your name on the comments!